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That sounds like your friend was in a custom mode that was set to eaasier than you.
I build in Creative mostly now (2,000+ hours in) and have been visited by griefers that tried to shoot me (didn’t work, 'cos hello… creative!) and in one case, the guy came in surrounded by a cloud of VERY salty Sentinels that swarmed my base area and were chasing and shooting at both of us.
It’s quite irritating to get shot at while you’re trying to build something.
Once he cottoned on that I wasn’t killable, he checked out the build, gave a thumbs up and left and the Sentinels went with him, never to be seen again.
It’s definitely weird when different play modes meet, for sure.
Nah, I experienced that too. We’d be in the same location and one player would have a weather event while the other didn’t.
And yes, same difficulty setting, though that shouldn’t matter for multiplayer.