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Maybe the correct phrase would be “the people from UK created the problem…” but my point stand.

Putting it this abstractly says very little about causality.

They don’t join private clubs as it were[…]

Even joining a private club is a negotiation, albeit a much simpler one: you agree to follow a set of rules when you join or you decide the rules if you are a founding member of a new club.

There is much more at stake in a union of states. A private club between individuals is not a good analogy. Almost every aspect is different.

Nuclear bombs were dropped on Nagasaki and Hiroshima, the Nuclear aspect was legal at the time. Now there are many states that have pledged to not use nuclear weapons.

Nuclear is legal also now. What prevent the use of nuclear weapons is the Mutual Assured Destruction doctrine, nothing else. Nobody is so stupid (not even Iran or Putin) to belive that they can launch a nuclear attack and then survive the retaliation.

No leader is this stupid or brazen, yes. But I have established that states can act in a quite stupid way. Aside from nuclear weapons being legal or not, there are states that have agreed to not use them in a codified fashion.

I remember that back then, a soldier was required to disobey an illegal order, it was one of the first thing that was said to a new soldier.

Well, that doesn’t translate in practice.