I teach English and philosophy at a 30th grade level. You wanna know how I’m doing? Well, I might be homeless again soon, I think the CIA is manipulating me, and God can’t stop dicking around with the phenomequalitesselation of the karmic entanglements within my monadic lens of reality, but at least I have decided I am a prophet of the Mormon Church and will be the 48th and 50th president of the United States soon, so I got that going for me.