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It would be nice if these kinds of projects moved towards developing and using interoperable standards, so using something like XMPP seems like a good direction. It makes sense that people have different preferences and dealbreakers for software but it seems like it should be unnecessary for open source chat programs to be the subject of contentious arguments about which one people should use. The argument should be whether to keep using Discord etc. or switch to a unified open ecosystem, not Discord vs picking one of many separate small networks.
The lack of interoperability between modern chat apps is a real tragedy. I remember the days when you could have a single messenger app of your choice and talk to people across different networks instead of having to juggle a whole bunch of apps like you do today. Really shows why open protocols are so important.
There never was. It was only a sea of different instant messenger protocols, and each had their pros and cons. So much that you had meta messengers, doing multiple protocols. Trillian for example. You had to get multiple accounts and softwares to get everyone.
Protocols were understood well enough that you could build a single app that could communicate across different platform. That’s basically not feasible today.